About two years ago, a Grand Traverse County mother and grandfather were assaulted during a custody-related child exchange in a McDonald’s parking lot. The public place did not keep them from danger, nor did the young mother bringing her father prevent injuries.

Safe Haven, a branch of Child & Family Services of Northwestern Michigan, offers a comfortable and safe environment for child exchanges and supervised visits while parents deal with issues of physical or emotional abuse, stalking, return of an absent parent, and more.

“This program is the largest of its kind in the state,” says Erin House, Safe Haven’s program and fundraising coordinator. “At any given time, we are serving anywhere from 65 to 90 families.”

Since 2004, Safe Haven’s staff has facilitated approximately 25,000 supervised visits and exchanges.

Walking through the doors of Safe Haven is a carefully choreographed event. For a visit or exchange to occur, parents must park in two different parking lots, use two different entrances on two different floors, arrive at two different times, and leave at two different times. This procedure ensures that the parents will have no contact with one another.

Upon arrival, all bags and purses are searched prior to any interaction. “One parent may try to send a threatening note or object to the other parent using the child,” explains House.

From video surveillance to staff supervision behind two-way mirrors, visits and exchanges at Safe Haven are monitored to ensure the safety for all involved. Staff members diligently listen to conversations between the parent and child to ensure they are appropriate. They also watch for signs of a child’s discomfort or fear, sometimes using predetermined words or hand gestures to signal for help.

Between these intricacies and other potential conflicts, scheduling and facilitating visits and exchanges is a logistical feat; one that occurs on average of 12 times per day.

After all the distractions are removed, Safe Haven’s goal is to have parents focus on being good mothers and fathers to their children. “The events that lead families to us have a profound effect on the kids, both mentally and physically,” says House. “These visits and exchanges are a chance for their family to work towards a better future.”

Regretfully, Safe Haven’s future is unknown. Due to changes in grant structure and increased competition for funds, they were unable to secure the federal funding they relied on for more than a decade.

“Through other grants and donations, we can keep our doors open for a while longer.” says House. “We will be able to reapply for the federal grant in the fall, but until then, we are going to need help.”

Without programs like Safe Haven, northern Michigan families in need may be forced to return to public spaces for child exchanges. With federal and local support, Safe Haven’s tireless efforts can continue to ease the minds of countless children and parents going through tough times.

Please visit Safe Haven’s website at fsnwmi.org/safehaven to donate or for more information.